I’ll never forget the day that I met Jim Cross.

I was a young manager and Jim would have a dramatic impact on how I managed, how I treated people and both the strategic and tactical decisions I would make in how I ran my IT operation.

But Jim was probably not the guy you would expect him to be.

When we think of someone who is an “influencer”, we tend to think of someone who is perhaps older than us, wiser than us, in a position bigger than ours and so on. I think that many of us believe that unless we have these attributes, that we are not in any position to influence others.

But that’s not true. And it certainly wasn’t the case with Jim.

When I met him, Jim had long hair and was a bit gangly. He was only a year or two older than I was and he could be a little rough around the edges. He was one of our telecom technicians and I was being groomed for management.

And yet Jim had an inordinate amount of influence on me at this important and impressionable time of my life.

Why? What was it that Jim did that gave him this influence – especially when it seemed to run counter to the impression that most of us have about what it takes to influence others?

The Four Keys to Influencing Others

It is common to think that you can only influence someone when they report to you in some way. But that isn’t really influence. That’s just telling someone what to do. Having influence is when people listen to you because they want to, because they believe in what you’re saying – not because they have to listen to you. And because of that, it’s much more powerful.

Not only did I not work for Jim, in the end, he ended up working for me. And yet through it all, he had a tremendous amount of influence over both me and how I ran my team. The reasons why provide lessons for all of us in how we can influence those around us – a skill that is becoming increasingly important as we transition into the next generation of IT.

Jim was able to influence me because he exhibited four key characteristics that made me trust in and believe in him. These are the same four characteristics that you must exhibit if you want to influence those around you.

Get It Done

Nothing speaks louder than results. Jim may have been “just” a telecom technician, but he was the guy we turned to whenever something just had to get done. He was our “go to” guy. He did his job without fuss and would rise to any challenge that we threw at him.

Because he was the guy that would always get the job done, subconciously it told me that this was someone that I should pay attention to. Let’s face it, we all like to surround ourselves with winners. When you get the job done consistently and reliably, when you are the person that people turn to when they need something handled just so, you stand out as a winner. And you set yourself up to have significant influence on those around you.

Be Authentic

But it was more than just the fact that Jim got things done that made the difference. It was also how he did it. He didn’t try to get fancy with things, he wasn’t a showboat. He was just being true to himself. Jim was a little bit like the “good ol’ home sytle cookin'” that he loved: simple, easy to understand and just plain good.

You never felt that there were any games at play when you worked with Jim. He would tell it like it was and was unafraid to tell you what you needed to hear. You knew that every time you dealt with him, you were getting the real deal.

And that created mountains of trust.

I knew exactly what to expect from Jim – and that enabled me to put my guard down and be open to whatever he had to tell me.

Balance Confidence & Humility

When I met him, Jim had been at the company for a number of years and had, in part, grew up with the company. As a result, he knew both the people and the technology really well. When he worked or interacted with people, he projected an aire of confidence that was borne of this experience. He knew what he was doing and it showed.

At the same time, he never pretended to know it all nor did he feel a need to protect either his knowledge or his relationships. I remember when I started and we had grown to know each other a bit, he walked me around the company and introduced me to everyone he knew – and that was a lot of people. He would introduce me and then make it clear that, like him, I was someone they could trust. It was a ringing personal endorsement from someone that they had grown to trust to get it done. He then proceeded to walk me through everything he did and showed me all of his “secrets” to making things work.

His level of humility in how he approached me, his work and the people he served, was staggering. He was unafraid to share anything and everything. In our highly competitive and sometimes combative corporate world today, this kind of attitude can seem foreign. But this balance of confidence and humility only further cemented the idea that Jim was someone from whom I could learn much.

Care About People

But more than anything else that I remember about that first interaction with Jim was how he interacted with everyone else. Within the first hour of meeting him I had taken to calling him the “mayor” of our company. He seemed to know everyone. Most importantly, everyone knew him – and everyone liked him.

As Jim walked around the facility, he wasn’t an “IT guy” – he was a goodwill ambassador. As he talked to people, it was clear that he knew about their lives and that he cared about what was happening in them. There was no, “I’m from IT and I’m here to help” nonsense. He came as someone who genuinely cared about them and the immediate issue that they were facing. Yes, he solved their problem (that’s the “get it done” part), but most importantly, he did it in a way that communicated that he cared about the people he served – as people. They weren’t just “tickets” to him, they were people and he was there to care for their IT needs.

– – –

When I took it all into the balance, I realized that Jim was a guy that had some amazing lessons to teach me. Here was a guy that delivered the goods in an authentic way, but who managed to do it with humility and a genuine desire to be of service to those around him. As a result – and despite the fact that Jim eventually reported to me – Jim was the guy that I turned to when I needed advice on how to best handle almost any situation. It didn’t matter if it was a technical architecture decision or a sticky staffing issue, because of who Jim was and what he had demonstrated to me, I knew he was someone that I could trust to give me the straight scoop. I knew that he was speaking as someone who knew how to get the job done, but I also knew that he would always tell me the truth – even if the truth was that he didn’t have an answer. But more importantly, I knew that he would answer me from the perspective of what was best for me – not what was politically expedient or what was politically correct. Because I knew that he cared about people – including me – I knew that his advice would be from the heart and from a place of humility.

For all of these reasons, I trusted Jim completely. In fact, I still do. To this day, he is one of my closet confidants and someone’s who’s advice I seek and in whose counsel I trust. And he is a perfect example of how to have a tremendous amount of influence on those around you – no matter what your position may be. When you approach a situation from these four perspectives, people will notice. They will pay attention and they will respect you for it. And when you have something to say, they will listen.

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